Stalemate
by honestlybroken
Summary: "Each step Cloud took, each item he tossed in his bag, sent a shooting pain through Leon's chest. But he couldn't let the blond know. His pride refused to show such vulnerability."
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts. I barely own the laptop used to type this.**

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Cool, grey eyes followed the blue-eyed blond as he moved around the room. The blond swordsman's movements were deceptively graceful, his toned muscles attributing to his fluidity. Leon always found himself captivated by the blond. By something ordinary like the way his chest rose and fell with each breath, or the way his hips swayed unintentionally when he walked. He was always mesmerized by the way the sunlight reflected in those flaxen spikes, and how it revealed the freckles that littered his porcelain face. He would find himself lost in the deep pools of his eyes, especially in the way they twinkled when he smiled. And he could listen to his laugh until his dying day. But none of that mattered now. Not to Cloud.

Leon was sat on the foot of the bed watching as Cloud gathered what little belongings he called his own. The silence had grown antiquated and uncomfortable. Nothing like the shared silences they both used to take comfort in not too long ago. Each step Cloud took, each item he tossed in his bag, sent a shooting pain through Leon's chest. But he couldn't let the blond know. His pride refused to show such vulnerability.

When Leon had arrived home after a Committee meeting that ran late, he found Cloud waiting for him. The blond was seated on their couch, back rigid and hands clasped. He had looked up at the sound of the front door closing and met Leon's cold glare with one of his own.

"I've finished fixing up Sora's old Gummy ship."

Leon had grunted in response. He knew where this was going and didn't like it. But he was too hard-headed to stop the blond.

That seemed to be all Cloud needed before he was in the bedroom packing his things. Leon could do nothing but follow. Finding himself sitting on the foot of the bed watching Cloud erase himself from the brunette's life.

As Cloud tossed an old pair of leather gloves into the bag he had sitting on a desk he glanced at Leon. The same stony expression he'd been on the receiving end the past several weeks was plastered on the brunette's scarred face. Cloud let out an exasperated sigh as he plopped down on the simple wooden chair that matched the desk.

"Whatever this is, it's not working." If Cloud hadn't been staring at the wall, hard enough to drill holes through it, he would have seen the pain flash across Leon's face.

"Whatever this is?" Leon scoffed. "This _was_ a relationship until you stopped trying."

"So it's all my fault? Fuck you." Cloud bit back. He could feel his anger boiling, ready to erupt. This could have turned into yet another of their fights but instead, body deflating, he let out a sigh, "Actually Leon, let's not start this again." Cloud was exhausted. Emotionally and physically exhausted. These arguments that took up any time they spent together left the blond drained.

Their relationship had started by accident, had taken the two men completely by surprise. They had fallen into each other almost by default. They were both strong, silent warriors. Socially inept, broken men who found refuge in each other's company, then in each other's beds. The girls, Aerith especially, had forced the two into an uneasy friendship. Gods knew they needed it. The push and the companionship. The two men found their shared silences comforting and familiar. Neither of them pushing for more than what the other could offer. That uneasy friendship soon grew and flourished. That was until the heartless were destroyed and the war ended.

They were both fighters, soldiers, and they both needed an enemy. They found that enemy in each other. The day-to-day domestics of a peaceful life were foreign, and in the end unwelcome. It had started off okay. Both found regular jobs that fit their skills, and they still sparred together when they found time. These matches helped defuse some of the growing tension and restlessness. But they were still growing apart, growing distant.

They had become virtual strangers, and when physical battles where no longer enough the arguments started. They argued over everything. Small things, like whose turn it was to take out the trash or what kinds of cereal they should buy, to larger things, like Cloud's constant trips or Leon's new secretary, all turned into arguments. Over time, their arguments grew to be better defined as screaming matches.

"You're a coward Cloud. Always have been. Running away as soon as things get tough, as usual." Leon knew his words would sting the blond. It's what he wanted.

"Me? The coward?" Cloud let out a hollow laugh. "Says the man who's so afraid of being alone. Don't worry about it Leonhart, I'm sure you'll find some new body to warm your bed" Cloud spat. The words tasting vile in his mouth.

He hated arguing with Leon. The brunette knew Cloud intimately. Knew all of his exposed nerves and just what words would hurt them the most. He knew which buttons to push to get the reaction he desired. And these days, he used that knowledge repeatedly. The only defense Cloud knew was returning the favour, striking Leon in all his weak spots.

The truth was, Cloud really was scared. He was scared of the new feelings he wasn't equipped to handle. He was scared of the way every argument felt like a shard of glass digging further into his heart. He was scared of how vulnerable he felt around Leon. How just being in the same room as the scarred brunette left him feeling open and exposed to the whole world. Like a book anyone could pick up and read. His deepest, darkest secrets written out all over his skin. Leon was right, he was a coward and he was running. He couldn't stay leaving himself open to this new, emotional pain that left him feeling raw.

With a sigh, Cloud stood up and securely fastened his bag. Leon remained on the bed, eyes never leaving the blond as his nimble fingers secured the buckles and clasps. This was it. Their last chance. Cloud made his way to the door before stopping. He turned enough to look Leon in the eye for the first time since he started packing. He searched Leon's grey eyes, hoping to see anything he could take as a reason to stay. All he found was Leon's famous slow-burning anger.

"Get out." Leon hissed through clenched teeth. His resolve was fading fast. If Cloud didn't leave now, Leon would be on his knees begging him to stay.

With no further hesitation, Cloud turned on his heel and stormed out of the room.

The slamming of the front door cut through Leon's barriers and he let out an anguished cry before breaking down into uncontrollable, gut-wrenching sobs.

"Please don't go."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** Thanks to some lovely encouragement, Stalemate is no longer a one-shot! Here is chapter 2 of 3.

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Four months. It had been four months since Cloud left. And Leon would be lying if he said he hadn't thought about the blond every day of those four months. The first week he spent wallowing in self-pity. Hoping that Cloud had heard his pathetic plea begging him to stay. The second week was spent fuming. If Cloud had returned Leon would have sooner punched him than listen to him. And after those first two weeks, Leon was still convinced Cloud would be back. All those other times he had taken off, Cloud was always back after no more than a couple of weeks. So each day following, Leon had spent expecting to see those bright, blue eyes and messy, blond spikes.

Leon let out a sigh. He had been staring at the ceiling in silence since his most recent bed-mate had fallen asleep about an hour ago. Cloud had been right. Leon was afraid of being alone and he hadn't taken very long before he searched for someone to keep his bed warm. Over the past three months, Leon had sought all manner of companion. Male or female. It hadn't mattered to the brunette. All that mattered was if they were willing. And for an attractive man such as Leon, there was no shortage of willing partners.

The brunette turned on to his side, his eyes tracing the light-brown hair splayed out over the spare pillow. Cloud had been right about Leon's secretary as well. The peach scented hair and gentle breathing belonged to her. While most of Leon's _companions_ came from regular trips to the local bars, it hadn't taken long for him to let her seduce her way into his bed. She was nice enough, most of them had their qualities. But none of them were Cloud. It was in these moments, in the quiet of the night, Leon would realize just how much it hurt losing the blond.

No one could match Cloud. None of them tasted like Cloud. None of them sounded like Cloud. He missed tracing his fingers across light scars on otherwise smooth skin. He missed tangling his fingers in those soft, blond spikes. He missed breathing in Cloud's scent, a mix of vanilla and mint. He missed when Cloud came home smelling of stale beer or motor oil dependent on whether he had a shift at Tifa's bar or Cid's garage. He even missed the foul stench of cigarettes from the filthy habit Cloud had picked up working with Cid for too long. Leon missed the way their bodies fit perfectly together. How Cloud fit just right curled against his side, head tucked under Leon's chin. He even found himself missing being abruptly awakened by Cloud's recurring nightmares.

Quietly, Leon slid out of his bed and located an old pair of sweats. As he made his way out of his room and down the stairs, Leon thought back on the last time he had been woken by one of Cloud's nightmares. It had been about a week before he left. Cloud had stubbornly insisted upon sleeping on the sofa for several weeks by this point, refusing to let Leon so much as touch him. Leon couldn't even remember what that argument had been about.

That night Leon had woken to a pained scream coming from the living room downstairs. He pulled himself from the warmth of his bed and carefully descended the steps, following scared sobs and whimpers. Like many nights before, Leon carefully maneuvered the thrashing blond so he could sit on the couch with Cloud safely nestled in his lap. Once settled, he proceeded to trace soothing circles along Cloud's back and arms.

"Hush now Cloud. It's okay. You're going to be okay. I've got you." Leon continued to murmur soothing words while he rocked Cloud gently. Every night this happened Leon would soothe the blond until he drifted back into a restful sleep. But this time Cloud woke up.

"Lee?" Bright blue eyes looked up at Leon through heavy lids. His tear-stained face was painted with confusion, but started to relax as the scarred brunette came into focus.

Leon's heart fluttered at Cloud's affectionate nickname, lips curling up into a soft smile. How long had it been since he last heard that? "Yeah Cloud, it's me. You were having a nightmare. You're safe now. I promise. Go back to sleep." Leon whispered while gently brushing sweat covered bangs from the blond's face.

Cloud's eyes fluttered shut as he slowly nodded. Leon placed a chaste kiss to Cloud's forehead before pulling the blond close to his chest. As Leon continued his gentle murmurs, silent tears streamed from a pair of blue eyes, soaking into the white shirt Leon had worn to bed. Eventually, the blond fell back into what proved to be a dreamless sleep. Leon knew he should go back to bed, just like he knew he should have every previous night. But like those nights, he stayed on the couch, watching as Cloud slept.

Leon had stayed on the couch, Cloud in his arms, until the early morning sun appeared in the sky. Once again he gently shifted the blond, laying him back on the couch. With a last kiss to Cloud's cheek, Leon made his way back upstairs to shower and get ready for work.

Back downstairs and ready for work, Leon was greeted by the pleasant aroma of bacon, eggs and freshly brewed coffee. Cloud had made him a quick breakfast before heading out for his early shift at Cid's. A full smile spread its way across Leon's face. He thought things with Cloud would only get better. He couldn't have been more wrong.

Stopping at the hall closet, Leon pulled out the blanket and pillow Cloud had used all those months ago when he slept on the couch. He hadn't spent a full night in his bed since Cloud left. It felt too cold and empty, whether he had company for the night or not. Instead he had taken to sleeping on the sofa, curled up in blankets that still contained traces of Cloud's scent. He knew he was pathetic for it. Grasping at memories so hard it caused a constant ache in his chest, but being too stubborn to do anything about it. He could call Cloud. The girls did. But what would he even say?

He fucked up. Leon had thought that after the heartless everything would work out how _he_ wanted. He would expand the Restoration Committee to an inter-world development company, help to restore other worlds destroyed by the heartless. He had mistakenly figured Cloud would follow like the good little soldier he was. Leon had not counted on Cloud deciding he was done with following other people's wishes, done dealing with responsibilities. The blond had not wanted to be tied down by anyone or anything. He chose to take part-time positions working for Cid and Tifa, using bar tips to fund his various trips.

Turning over on the couch, Leon clutched his blanket closer thinking about the longest trip Cloud had taken since the heartless. He had come home from work to find Cloud waiting with a packed bag and large grin. He announced he'd be back in a couple of days before hitching a ride off world with Sora. Three weeks later, and Leon had received no word from Cloud.

He had been walking home from the office when he spotted a head of familiar blond spikes making its way through the marketplace. Cloud was walking alongside Sora, both wearing matching grins as they shared tales of their latest adventures.

If it was at all possible, Cloud's face brightened when his eyes landed on Leon from across the market. He quickened his pace, making his way towards the scarred brunette. Completely ignorant of the scowl marring Leon's face. "Hey Lee! You'll never guess what I was doing" Cloud greeted him cheerfully.

Leon's scowl deepened. Cloud's carefree attitude grating on his already frayed nerves. "A couple of days?" Leon asked, folding his arms across his chest.

"What? Oh right, when I left… But forget that" Cloud waved his hand, dismissing Leon's words. "I entered this cross-world race and—"

"A couple of days Cloud. You said you'd be back in a couple of days. Three _weeks_ ago!" Leon had tried to stay calm, speaking through clenched teeth. But his frustration had reached boiling point forcing him to lash out at the blond.

"Leon. I can take care of myself." Cloud gritted out, his own frustration seeping into his voice.

"That's not the point. You can't just take off for three weeks without telling me. Did you even once think about me? About how worried I would be?"

"I didn't think—"

"No Cloud, you didn't think. You _never_ think! Gods you are such a selfish _idiot_." Leon seethed.

As soon as the words left his lips Leon knew he should regret them, but he didn't. He watched as they hit Cloud like a ton of bricks with sick satisfaction. Cloud's entire being deflated as his self-worth flooded out making room for the all too familiar feeling of self-loathing. Cloud's face burned with shame. He hung his head and his shoulders slumped as he curled in on himself. He mumbled an apology before swiftly exiting the marketplace, heading off down the nearest street.

They all knew about Cloud's fragile self-esteem. Leon more so than most. They had worked hard at letting the blond know he was important and cared for, pulling him back from the brink of darkness multiple times. Leon had spent so long showing Cloud he needed him as more than some fuck-buddy. The first night Leon had convinced Cloud to stay until morning had been the best night of his life. But his anger had blinded him to all this. Right now he had just wanted the blond to hurt like he did. To feel unimportant to the most important person in his life.

Leon watched after Cloud's retreating back. His anger slowly dwindling with each step Cloud took in his retreat leaving the brunette feeling hollow. These days that had become a common feeling after dealing with Cloud. Leon knew he loved Cloud. He had loved him so fiercely it hurt. But he just couldn't deal with Cloud's childish antics. Letting out a sigh, Leon turned around only to come face-to-face with Sora. The normally bubbly teen was wearing a scowl to rival even Leon's. And that was when the brunette knew he had fucked up yet again.

It was beginning to look like another long night in a string of many. Leon sat up enough to give his pillow a few good punches in an effort to fluff it up. Childish or not, Leon needed Cloud by his side. The blond was his rock, his other half, and he wasn't going to just give him up. Leon resolved as soon as he could he was going to contact Cloud and he was going to fight for his blond. Leon only prayed he wasn't four months too late.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** And finally the conclusion to Stalemate!

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For the hundredth time that morning, Cloud let out a frustrated sigh. He'd been sitting in the cockpit of his borrowed Gummi trying to find the courage to face everyone. Especially Leon. He flew the Gummi into the hanger out back of Cid's garage late last night, not wanting to attract too much attention. The night was spent replaying the last time he saw Leon. More specifically, the last words Leon had said to him. Two simple words that had brought Cloud's whole world crashing down.

_Get out._

Hunched over in his chair Cloud held his head in his hands, fingers clenching blond spikes in frustration. He didn't know how to fix this, and he didn't know if he could. Leon told him to leave.

Cloud had hoped Leon would stop him, or go after him, but he never did. Instead Cloud spent four very miserable months wandering aimless. He entered in a few races, winning most. Fought in multiple struggle matches, winning every one. Eventually he returned to Olympus where he competed in several tournaments. All the while waiting for Leon.

He had to apologize to the brunette for everything. For refusing to work with Leon, and taking off every time he had needed Cloud's help. For all the times he had purposefully riled Leon up looking for a fight; like he actually gave a damn what kind of cereal Leon wanted. He needed forgiveness for the times he didn't trust Leon, for suspecting him of cheating with that secretary. He had been insecure and immature. It was nothing short of miraculous that Leon put up with him for as long as he had.

He needed Leon more fiercely than he'd ever needed anyone before. He craved his touch, the feel of those calloused hands softly tracing their way over his body. He yearned for his kiss, the taste of Leon's tongue in his mouth, and the way he could lose himself to those lips. Being in the presence of the brunette left Cloud feeling vulnerable, but he had never felt safer than when he was in Leon's arms.

Cloud slumped forward, smacking his forehead on the dash. With a scowl he, he rubbed at the blossoming bruise that was sure to have appeared. Just another mark to adorn his already beat up body. Without Leon to look after him, Cloud continuously forgot to eat and his nights were plagued by nightmares limiting his sleep. The mako running through his body lacked the fuel it needed to heal him, leaving Cloud afflicted with his various injuries.

Standing from his chair, Cloud straightened out his clothes as best he could. They were torn, dirty, and wrinkled. He was going to show up on Leon's doorstep looking like shit asking for a second chance. He didn't know where to start. How did someone apologize for being such a complete fuck-up? For screwing up everything and everyone he got close to? Cloud knew he didn't deserve Leon, but that wouldn't stop him from trying. Not when he had made it this far.

Leon woke up to an empty house and a purpose. As he put Cloud's bedding back in the hall closet and adorned his regular leather pants and white tee, Leon attempted to gather his tattered nerves. Why would Cloud want to talk to him after everything? He'd been a jerk. Pushing the blond away at every turn.

As mentally prepared as he'd ever be, he called Cloud. There was no answer the first time. Or the second. With a resigned sigh, Leon sunk back on to the couch. Cloud never answered his phone, this time should be no different. But Leon knew it was.

The brunette sat on the couch trying to reassure himself that Cloud hadn't been avoiding his calls when a sudden feeling of dread washed over him. He hadn't heard anyone mention talking to Cloud in a while, it was possible the blond was in trouble. Gods knew what kind of trouble a pissed off Cloud could land himself in. Leon was off the couch and pacing. He should have gone after Cloud the moment he left. And why didn't he? Pride. His foolish pride had kept him in Radiant Garden, living as if nothing was wrong. Cloud would be back. He _had_ to come back.

Running fingers through tangled hair, Leon started making a mental list of all the possible worlds Cloud could have headed to. He could prioritize them, and if he moved fast, got everything sorted, he could be heading out no later than first thing tomorrow morning in search of the missing blond. Stuffing his feet roughly into his boots, Leon made his way to the door. He flung it open only to find himself face-to-face with Cloud.

Cloud had left the safety of the Gummi making his way to Leon's house. He took the longest route he knew, going over everything he wanted to say. He still hadn't found the right words when he arrived on Leon's doorstep. Taking a deep breath he raised a fist to knock on the door anyway. Before his fist made contact, the door was ripped open in front of him. He stared dumbly at the air in front of his hovering hand where the door had been before moving his eyes to the figure in the doorway. Leon was staring at him in shock. Cloud dropped his hand to the side, his fingers playing nervously with the fabric of his trousers. When he could no longer bear those scrutinizing grey eyes, Cloud dropped his gaze, wanting to look anywhere but at Leon.

When the initial shock wore off, Leon raked his eyes over the blond taking in his dishevelled appearance. He looked like he hadn't eaten in days, and hadn't slept in even longer. His tattered shirt hung loose on his too-slender shoulders, and he could hardly stand upright. The flaxen spikes Leon had been dreaming of were dull and drooping. Eyes that used to sparkle had faded emphasizing the dark bags beneath them. His once fair, porcelain face was covered by ugly marks. A bruise, green with age, covered one cheek while a fresh one stood out on his forehead. There was a small gash cutting through one eyebrow with several lacerations littered across both cheeks.

"Strife." Leon winced, his voice coming out harsher than he meant. Cloud simply nodded in understanding, having expected such a welcome.

"Leonhart," after a hesitant pause Cloud answered, lifting his gaze back up to meet Leon's.

"I could clean that." Leon broke the awkward silence, indicating a particularly nasty looking gash on Cloud's bicep.

Cloud nodded again, shifting past Leon to stand inside the foyer of the place he once called home. Leon closed the door behind him before disappearing down the hall, likely to retrieve a first-aid kit. Should Cloud follow him? Or should go to the kitchen to sit at the table, or perhaps Leon would be okay with him sitting on the couch. Maybe the brunette would prefer he just stayed in the entryway and didn't make himself too comfortable so he could be cleaned up and sent packing as quickly as possible. Cloud shifted nervously on his feet, biting his lower lip. This was harder than he thought.

Leon reappeared, first-aid kit in hand, bringing Cloud back from his thoughts. "We could take a seat on the couch. If you want."

Cloud moved to follow him into the living room when something caught his eye. On the floor, just under the window, was a purple, lacy bra. He could feel his stomach drop, heart breaking into thousands of little pieces. Leon had moved on. Keeping his mask of indifference, Cloud nudged the bra with the toe of his boot.

"You got yourself a girlfriend?" Cloud asked, raising an eyebrow in what he hoped portrayed amusement.

"Uh— no. No girlfriend. She's not my— Never mind. Just come here so I can clean that." A light dusting of pink coloured Leon's cheeks. How did he miss that? How did she leave without it? Trying to change the subject, he sat on one side of the couch, indicating for Cloud to join him.

Cloud took in a sharp breath as Leon cleaned his wound, the alcohol causing an unpleasant burn. They sat in silence as Leon first cleaned the wound then wrapped it tight. The two men were lost in thought. Both had been so ready to find the other and lay everything all out. How sorry they were, and how much they missed each other. But now that they were together everything just felt heavier, their history weighing down on them. There was a reason they argued. They were both so stubborn, too hard-headed to admit to being wrong. Wouldn't admitting feelings make them vulnerable? Would they be laying out all their insecurities and their darkest secrets? Would it be worth it?

Once Cloud was bandaged up, Leon decided to break the tense silence. "I know you must hate me but—"

"Hate you?" Cloud shifted on the couch so he could look Leon in the eye, "I could never hate you Leon."

"But you left..."

"You told me to."

"You wanted to leave. You _wanted_ me to tell you to go."

"No! I wanted you to tell me to stay!" Cloud had leapt to his feet, his anger raising. He'd always had a short-temper. And Leon had this way of making it shorter. "I wanted you to want _me, _Leonhart! Not your damn business. Not your perfect life, with your perfect job, and your fucking perfect secretary! I wanted you to want me. The way I am! Flaws and all."

Large blue eyes stared Leon down, challenging him. He had hated feeling like Leon was trying to change him. Trying to mold Cloud into his own perfect soldier that followed all of Leon's plans and ambitions. Who would go work some nine to five job in Leon's business and never question whether he had really wanted to or not. Enough people had already used Cloud as their puppet. He couldn't bear the thought of adding Leon to that list.

"I did wan— I _do_ want you Cloud." Leon had no idea that Cloud held so much resentment towards his business. When they fought over Cloud refusing to work for Leon, Leon had thought Cloud was just being difficult, throwing tantrums like a petulant child. But now he knew there was more to it. The business was a symbol to Cloud. A reminder of Shinra. Cloud was afraid Leon only wanted to use him. Control him like many had before. He was afraid he was no longer good enough for Leon, that he no longer fit in Leon's life.

"You should have told me. I would ha—" Cloud interrupted Leon with a derisive snort as he folded his arms across his chest, looking anywhere but at the tall brunette. Leon sighed, pitching the bridge of his nose in frustration, "I don't want to fight anymore Cloud. Can't we just forget about all of it? I don't want what's between us to be over. Not like this. We've been through too much for this."

"Isn't it?" Cloud looked pointedly at the lacy bra before eyeing Leon skeptically.

"And you didn't? You were never with anyone else?" Leon questioned defensively folding his arms across his chest mimicking Cloud's stance.

"No one else. There's been no one since you."

Guilt started clawing at Leon as he watched the hurt flash across Cloud's face. He knew all those times he had been betraying Cloud, but he could never bring himself to stop. "You were right Cloud, I'm a coward. I'm terrified of being alone." Leon dropped his arms to his side lowering his gaze to study a small stain on the carpet. He wouldn't blame Cloud for walking out again. "Everyone always leaves me and I'm too much of a coward to face it. So I—I was an idiot. But none of them could replace you. Ever." The last word was said as Leon forced his eyes back up to look directly into Cloud's. He could see the pain of betrayal swirling in those blue depths. Leon had to get the blond to understand, they meant nothing.

Them? How many people had Leon slept with? Taking in a deep breath, feeling sick to his stomach, Cloud asked, "Your secretary?"

Leon had never understood the intense hatred Cloud felt towards that woman. He didn't even understand it now. And even though he knew it would hurt Cloud, and could ruin any chance he had with him, Leon nodded. "She was the most recent." He had never felt so ashamed in his life.

"For fuck's sake Leon!" Cloud yelled. The slight waver in his voice betrayed how hurt he really was. "Seems like you're doing just fine here without me."

For the second time in four months, Leon watched Cloud storm out of with a sense of finality. Only this time Leon was determined to go after him.

The streets outside were mostly empty. It had started lightly raining while they were inside, and most people had headed indoors. Cloud was already nowhere in sight. Leon took off towards Cid's garage, expecting that to have been where Cloud parked, and where he was heading now. Leon was quickly dashing down streets, taking any shortcut he could think of. If Cloud left now, there was every chance he'd never come back. Leon finally caught up to Cloud just outside the marketplace. He grabbed the blond's arm forcing him to turn around and face Leon.

"Please don't go." This times the words weren't said too late and to an empty house. They were said directly to the blond. Loud, clear, and full of meaning.

Cloud's brows were drawn together in anger and his lips twisted into a snarl, but his eyes were swimming with unshed tears. Leon knew that Cloud's eyes always betrayed his true feelings. No matter how he would school his features, those blue eyes were always giving him away. At least to Leon.

"I miss you Cloud. I miss you so much. I miss those damn spikes of yours and your scowl. I miss your short-temper and stubborn streak. I miss the feel of you in my arms when we curl up on the couch and I miss falling asleep listening to the sound of your breathing. I miss kissing you just because I feel like it, and holding your hand when we're taking a walk. I miss making love to you, watching as you fall apart making the most delicious sounds. I miss waiting up for you to come home from a shift at Tifa's and I miss trying to wash grease stains from your clothes. I even miss the smell of your blasted cigarettes." Leon took a deep breath looking Cloud directly in those beautiful pools of blue. He wanted the blond to know how much he meant what he was saying. How much he meant what he was going to say. "I miss everything about you Cloud. I need you more than anything. I fucking _love_ you Cloud Strife. I love you flaws and all."

Cloud just stared at Leon in complete shock. He had just told Cloud everything he wanted to hear and Cloud's brain was trying hard to process what to do with it. When Cloud made no move to reply, Leon dropped his arm and stood back. He had been an idiot to think that's all he needed to do.

Things were too long damaged for them, and maybe they were never meant to be. The worlds had changed and no longer fit the two of them. They had both been soldiers afraid of letting anyone in for fear of them getting hurt. It had made sense getting together with someone who was able to defend themselves. But there were no more wars to be won, and it was time to move on. With a heavy heart, Leon took another step back. He'd let Cloud go. For both their sakes.

"Leon wait." Leon halted his retreat, waiting for the blond to continue. "I miss you too. And I—I love you Lee." Leon couldn't help but smile, his fragile heart beating hard in his chest. No matter how long they had been together, Cloud had never managed to say those three words to him. Leon knew he loved him, Cloud showed him in every way he could. But to hear those words meant the world to the brunette. "But what if we were never meant to work? What if we just keep hurting each other? I can't keep living like this. I don't want to hurt you again." Cloud met Leon's gunmetal grey eyes, matching his intensity as he tried to show the scarred brunette how much it hurt even just saying it.

"I'm willing to keep trying if you are. Or we could start over."

"Start over?" Cloud tilted his head in confusion, squinting his eyes at the brunette. "What?"

"Hi. I'm Squall Leonhart but everyone calls me Leon. I like spikey-headed blonds with blue eyes and childish tendencies." Leon offered his hand out to Cloud, a small grin tugging at his lips.

Quickly catching on, Cloud playfully rolled his eyes accepting the offered hand. "My name is Cloud Strife and I like bossy brunettes with ugly scars."

Leon let out a laugh pulling Cloud into his chest before meeting the blond's full lips in a kiss. Cloud's lips parted with a soft moan allowing Leon entrance into his mouth. It had been so long since they last tasted each other, the welcome flavours causing a warm rush to flood over them.

Cloud slowly pulled away for air, his breath ghosting over Leon's cheek. "Move a little fast, don't you Leonhart?"

Leon bent his head further down so he could nibble on Cloud's earlobe. "You have no idea," he growled.

Hand-in-hand, they made their way back to the house. There was no promise of a brighter future, no guarantee they'd make it, and they couldn't promise to never fight again. But they did promise to fight for each other. No matter what. And Leon promised to find a new secretary.

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**A/N:** I hope this lived up to the rest of the story. I rewrote it so many times. Thanks for reading!


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